Wednesday, April 26, 2023
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To Gene…..
The first night I met you was back in Spring of 2009. When I said I was a Bowers you almost broke my hand shaking it - which is crazy since I pride myself on a solid hand shake!! You told me that my cousin Ed Bowers was a huge rival in sports (Roscoe) and the hardest hitter you ever faced in football. From that night on we were drawn to one another. I didn’t know at that moment what an impact you would have in my life over the next 10 years. We would sit for hours and talk sports, women, and life… all the way to a few nights before Thanksgiving 2019. I can’t tell you how many nights we sat in Bummy’s by ourselves, talking like best friends.
The one thing during the funeral that no one mentioned and maybe no one knew, was one of the things I appreciated most about you……. free therapy! I didn’t realize what a great therapist you were until you left for the nursing home. Not only did you love talking, but you were equally as good at listening. With my job as a Corrections Officer and through my promotion, I truly loved and cherished your advice, especially when I transferred to a new facility. One night I actually even got you to do a drink with me and you chose Blackberry brandy, and that ended up being our shot about once every month or two, but only after your apple sauce.
And I know this sounds weird but I’ll never forget the sunset we watched together. You told Julie and I to get in the truck and to drive us all to the farm. You wanted to show us something special. Practically begged us. We weren’t sure why at first, so Julie and I threw you in my truck and took off for Divine Corners. We drove out behind Kyle’s house and then behind yours - we sat there until it was almost dark. It was amazing. The look on your face was priceless. I have always had an appreciation for sunsets since I was in the Coast Guard, but that moment got me. Truly got me.
Our last one-on-one talk I’ll never forget…. I left the bar to check on you for Kyle. I walked in and your face lit up like we were long lost buddies. Your last night before going to the nursing home ended up being one of my best nights, which is crazy weird to think. I went back and got you a meatball parm sub, apple sauce and potato salad, came back and ate dinner with you. You told me you didn’t want to go to the hospital and just wanted to sit there one more night. It was against my better judgement but I said okay, not knowing it would be your last night on the farm. We sat and talked like a regular night at Bummys. I miss that more than anyone could know.
The first time we brought you back to Bummy’s (after being admitted to the nursing home) we had to do a detour in Liberty that accidentally brought us back to your farm. It was fate, and I saw the tear down your left cheek. Literally. You asked if we could drive through the fields. Julie was nervous in her Cherokee but I was like “hell yeah!” (Lol). We sat in the field behind your house facing the reservoir and let you soak it in. Truly an emotional moment that all of us needed.
I’ll stop by the farm and drive out the field from time to time.
Love and miss you big guy. R.I.P.
Ryan Bowers (and Julie)
Liberty, NY 845-292-7160
Woodbourne, NY 845-434-7363
Livingston Manor, NY 845-439-4333